Six Ways Traveling The World Healed My Body Image Problems

I’ve struggled with an eating disorder and body image issues since I was twelve. I’m in a pretty great place with my recovery now but I definitely still struggle and insecurities still linger. I am not alone in this.

As a society, we have a very disordered relationship to food and our bodies, especially women. It’s hard to meet anyone who is fully comfortable or confident in their own skin as is. Everyone struggles with body image.

Despite doing some serious self work, my body size and habits greatly depend on my stress level. At least once a year, I would fall into a pretty intense and dark place- my need for control and obsession with controlling my body taking me into parts of my eating disorder.

The result would usually be a period of weight gain with rapid weight loss and then stability until the cycle began again. 

Choosing to Challenge My Body Image + Habits

When I signed up to travel the world at the end of 2018, an opportunity that I was so privileged to have, I was excited but I was also nervous.

I was obsessed and reliant on group fitness classes and having intense control of a schedule. Also, I’d never lived with more than one person at a time, and rarely someone I didn’t know. 

I knew that traveling would essentially be surrendering control to basically everything I held so dear and yet I was determined to do it anyway. The result?

I found balance both physically and mentally. Despite some struggles, I was able to get to a healthier place with myself and my body image than I ever had before. 

For many, traveling is not an option and is definitely a privilege. If you can, I do recommend it, but it’s not for the faint of heart. Travel will challenge you- which is the point.

If you can’t travel though, the things I learned below by losing control and familiarity of my environment can be replicated at home, with more consciousness. 

Obsessing Over What You Wear

While traveling, you have to pack light. Packing your wardrobe for a year with all four seasons into one suitcase is not easy. Two years later, I love that this is all I have.

Not only does it save me time, and money, it helps me stop obsessing over what I look like and how clothes fit me.

I used to have a massive closet. Mainly because every other day I would decide something looked too awful on me and I had nothing to wear. Choosing an outfit was exhausting.

While traveling, I essentially have two outfits for every occasion- and most of them are repeat offenders. I have to accept that no matter how crummy I feel, this is the one dress I own and I have to wear it out. 

Spending Hours Getting Ready

Most of the  apartments I’ve lived in have no full length mirrors, sometimes only a small wall mirror. Obviously, all mirrors are different and tweak your reflection in certain ways. This threw my body image into chaos if there were any subtle changes.

Now I have to just deal with it. If the mirror in my apartment for the month isn’t a flattering one, I breathed through it and got dressed anyway.

Most places have no hair dryers or curlers. Traveling light is necessary, so my makeup, accessories and beauty products can only be the essentials. 

I learned to be okay with what I look like, flaws and all, because I can’t do anything about it. It became incredibly liberating to go out or on dates without “getting ready.”

I realized that no one cared if I didn’t have perfect make-up, and people still found me attractive. Soon, I was basically going makeup free and effort free in most environments.

Learning to Love Food

I had never been a foodie previously. Food served one purpose- eating enough to sustain me but something I kind of hated. It was frustrating and always a source of anxiety. Is this healthy enough? Should I really be eating that? 

Meals were eaten while driving in the car, mostly alone, and snacks were more common than full meals. Weekends involved binge drinking but I wouldn’t just have one glass of wine and waste the calories. 

While traveling, food becomes your biggest source of socializing. It’s one of the best ways to explore as well and learn about new cultures. You start finding the adventure of food and notice the nuances of each region’s cuisine. I now find myself devouring cooking shows and interested in culinary arts.

Most societies center around food and have a healthier relationship to it than in the U.S. Long lunches with a set menu and a glass of wine were the norm in Lisbon.

Asian cooking involves tons of different creative dishes, all shared family style, and you don’t refuse what’s offered. In South America, they love to eat at 9 or 10 pm. They have lavish four hour dinners with flowing glasses of wine and lots of company.

Food became fun and I actually lost weight eating for pleasure. Before, my binge and restrict cycle did the opposite, no matter how hard I tried to restrict.

No Control Over Your Schedule

You have very little control over your schedule or your kitchen while traveling. You often spend time on long bus trips or walking around the city and you don’t know when you’ll eat next or squeeze in a workout but it’s the last thing you’re thinking about.

There is so much more to your life- it’s fuller, busier and the previous obsession starts to slip away. 

It’s incredibly freeing to have your brain suddenly become occupied by other activities and not being able to obsessively plan your fitness schedule or meals.

You have to learn flexibility and most importantly, you begin to reprioritize your life. 

Adhering to Unrealistic Beauty Standards

This was probably the most significant change for me that traveling and living abroad provided. Back home, we’re constantly bombarded with images, ads and expectations of what we should look like. 

My community felt this impact, so socially I really felt that pressure to look perfect all the time. I was always comparing myself to others.

Once abroad, besides the instagram models on my feed that I choose to unfollow, there weren’t many other external factors. 

My social circle was diverse and built around traveling, not much else. I couldn’t understand most of the locals and the ads for weight loss and plastic surgery faded into the background.

The women are so different- always beautiful, but different than what I normally see. It redefined my relationship with beauty and what standard I held myself to. 

Accepting What You Have

I’ve always been an obsessive ingredient and food label reader. Everything is organic. I kept up with the latest superfoods and plant based elixirs. With many different dietary restrictions, and the options that California gave me, this felt sustainable, though very obsessive and expensive. 

After going abroad, I quickly saw that I couldn’t find about 90% of the things I was dependent on. I would have to start eating soy instead of oat milk, if I could even find non-dairy milk. Sometimes, I would have to eat Doritos at gas stations. 

Now, I had to work with what I had, I couldn’t turn my nose up or say no or I wouldn’t be able to eat. I survived a whole month in Japan off of rice triangles and popcorn from 7/11 because it was my only affordable and vegetarian option. I definitely got savvy finding ways to stay healthy, but there weren’t always the best options.

Food aside, traveling forces me to be okay with the body I have because I’m not going to miss out on truly epic adventures due to insecurities. Going to the beach back home wasn’t exciting enough to coax me into a swimsuit when I feel awful and my body image is going crazy.

Cliff jumping in Colombia, however, or scootering around islands in Bali, is certainly worth telling myself to shut up and get in the water; no matter what I look like.

I also feel so much more empowered. I trekked to Machu Picchu for five days, which was over 50 miles of hiking, in every element. I’ve never felt so damn appreciative of my body in my life.

My own legs carry me across countries and around cities, in all conditions. It’s hard to hate it when it’s letting me do some badass, amazing things.

Traveling Saved My Life, Basically

I think traveling can be extremely stressful for those of us who struggle with body image issues or full blown eating disorders. If you can’t surrender either, it can just get worse.

After throwing my vices and schedule out the window, I had to confront my dependence and obsession with beauty and control. I think this is so liberating though. 

If you start to work through it, you can face your demons head on. Demons you thought you had already dealt with, or are resigned to deal with forever. You can be free.

Getting out of the society I always knew and the routine I was enslaved to, changed my life. I found freedom in flexibility.

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